So I wake up, and I go into the bathroom. Normally the toilet paper is on the window sil to the right, but it had been moved to the sink, which was right in front of my face, and I didn't see it. I just assumed it was out, so I spent the longest time trying to find more, even though what I was looking for was literally right in front of my face.

I've sampled Coca Cola's new product: Coke Blāk, the "carbonated fusion beverage."

I paid $1.59 plus tax (total: $1.69) for an 8 oz. bottle of Blāk. Up front, it looks like a traditional Coca Cola 8 oz. glass bottle, with some shrink wrap on it, displaying the new info. My guess was Coke's decision was simply "we gotta use these bottles somehow!" I've paid $1.99 plus tax ($2.12 in MN) for an 8 oz. can of Red Bull, Sobe Adrenaline Rush, Amp, and Orange County Chopper Energy Drink. I've also paid that same price for the 6 oz. Starbucks Double Shot. I have, at some point or another, sampled almost every energy drink we sell. Even compared to the $1.99 for the 16 oz. Monster, Lost, Adrenaline Rush (it comes in two sizes), Rock Star, the $2.09 (plus tax) 23.8 oz. Jolt, $1.69 for 14 oz. MDX, 99¢ for 16 oz. Rip It, and 89¢ for 16 oz. Vault, the $1.59 Coke Blāk seems like a rip off.

In my opinion, some things were never meant to be carbonated. Coffee is among it. Thank God that Starbucks didn't decide to carbonate Double Shot, though I still think putting some drinks in cans is wrong (but that's another rant... and about all that I agree with Faulkner on). When I read the words "carbonated fusion beverage," alarm bells started going off. I thought to myself, "what the hell is a fusion beverage?" What could they have mixed to make Coke any blacker? A new food coloring? Looking at the bottom of the bottle (the only part not covered in plastic wrap), it actually looked like a very deep brown (but the completely opaque wrapper didn't help with the darkness in the bottle). What could they have fused with? That's right: coffee. Basically, it's as if you mixed Coke and Coffee.

Blāk doesn't have the usual energy drink bite, the coffee bitterness, or the soda sweetness you'd expect. It's impossible to describe that this thing actually tasted like. Pretty much: watered down coffee with watered down Coke, then carbonated. It's truly an odd taste that is difficult to compare. After my mom tasted the drink, she agrees: "Cocaccino" should have been the drink's name (much in the same way all my friends agree that V for Vendetta should have been released on Nov. 5).

Is it worth the $1.59? Does it help restore your energy? Not really. It's worth buying just for the novelty of it, but I predict Blāk will crash and burn (Much like New Coke/Coke II), at least in the US.